Still Crazy After All These Years

My birthday is always a sort of time of reflection. I see that another year has gone by and question what I’ve accomplished in the interval.

I remember this time last year very well. Hammerhead and I had just returned from a short road trip from Portland and I was getting settled into my new apartment. It seems I’m still getting settled in. I have managed to get by the entire year without getting a job, but I don’t see that very much is different from last year. I’m still faced with the same challenges and the same problems, and the same lack of assets.

In the last year, I met Mais-Maria and learned to write letters. I learned a lot about what is happening in the world and very little about what is happening in my life. I like to think I healed a lot, but the things that haunted me then still haunt me now. The year has been far from wasted, but I can’t shake the feeling that a year of my life has been traded at a very low price.

Today I’m going to see a movie with L. and she said she’ll make dinner for me too. Sounds very nice, but I need to be careful.